The Importance of a High Health IQ
Life is short and difficult, that has been said many times. There is no need to make it any more difficult or to waste time. When students, friends, family members, and co-workers come to me for my thoughts I keep time and difficulty in mind. How many times have you heard things such as...
My friend Sophia told everyone that I _________________.
Isabella is supposed to be my best-friend and she has been gossiping about me all year.
Emma is ignoring me on the playground and every time I try to play with her she runs away with the other girls.
I’m hoping Jacob will ask me out...every day for the past six weeks I’ve sent him a text message.
My employee, Mason, keeps calling in sick and never comes to work prepared.
Life is short. The world has billions of people, billions with a “b”. Is this how you want to spend your time? Out of the billions of people on this planet, is there no one else? No other person to befriend? No other person to date? No other person to hire?
Let’s face it. Sometimes, you have to make decisions that you do not know how to make. Still, you have to do something! Being in control means that you make good decisions. You make decisions every day, like in order to get physically stronger you lift weights and by making good decisions every day you get stronger. The momentary pain is forgotten over time. That is key to remember, so one more time--the momentary pain is forgotten over time. In fact when you make good decisions, many problems will be solved. Most times this will require asking a series of Whys.
Digging down to the root of the issue is vital to figure out what decision to make in your relationship, family, classroom, kitchen, or office. A six step process is one way to make a decision: 1. Identify the challenge. 2. Consider your values. 3. List the options. 4. Weigh the consequences. 5. Decide and act. 6. Evaluate your choice. How you approach this process is affected in part by your personality traits. Understanding your personality, strengths, and weaknesses is a good place to start. The Myers-Briggs Indicator can help determine these things.
Refusing is an important muscle to build. The ability to refuse and say no to many things and people and move with liberty through your life sometimes takes time. Following is a list of refusal skills you can use to avoid doing something that you do not want to do our should not do. There are five important refusal skills that can be used to deal with pressure. 1. Avoid dangerous situations. 2. Say “No!” 3. Stand your ground. 4. Stay focused on the issue. 5. Walk away. Sometimes, saying no once will not be enough. You must be assertive, that is not the same as aggressive. A passive stance is no good, for example being “Too nice”, “Holding it in”, “Denial”, “Subtle Manipulation”, or “Weak boundaries”. Aggressive is not good either, being “Mean”, “Exploding”, or being “Powerless/Out of control”. Assertive means being “Firm”, using “I statements”, and having “Good boundaries”. (Holt)
Do you ever think about what your dream career would be? You dream spouse? Dream friend? At the same time, do you wonder if you could ever make those happen? With effort and determination, you can do most things you want to do. The key is to make good decisions to reach those good goals! Some of your dreams will be your long-term goals. Remember that long-term goals are made of short-term goals. Each step, large and small, is an important link in that chain. Reward your success! Reward yourself when you make progress toward your goal. A reward is a prize you give yourself or do for yourself for accomplishing a task.
Use a chart or a long term calendar to mark when you will earn an reward. Then share your success with family, friends, and co-workers. For example, go some place fun with friends and family for earning good grades. Do the same even for things such as eating well, dating well, and choosing good friends. Keeping these things in perspective is healthy. Avoiding wishful thinking, group think, and being overly optimistic are part of maintaining a healthy perspective. Billions of people on the planet, limited time, and billions of possibilities make good choice making an important skill.
Food for thought
What is your goal?
What are good values?
What will you physically do in the next five minutes
as a step in making a decision you have to make?
Credit: nationalgeographic.com my.hrw.com, and Pexels.com, Sindre Strøm
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